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Back Shelf Beauties
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Surviving Christmas Don't EVEN get me started on how idiotic it is to release a Christmas movie before Halloween. I haven't eaten my first bag of Halloween candy yet (I buy it for the little trick-or-treaters, but they won't miss a handful here or there), however, I'm supposed to pine away for chestnuts roasting over an open fire? If it was a great movie, I might be able to handle it, even love it, but Surviving Christmas doesn't come close to great. It's not dreadful, but it ain't giving me the Christmas cheer either. Ben Affleck stars as Drew - a shallow, materialistic, high-powered marketing executive who spends Christmas alone every year. He wants his equally shallow and materialistic girlfriend, Missy (Jennifer Morrison), to join him on a trip to Fiji for the holidays, but she is spending the time with her family, and questions why he can't do the same. Left alone again, Drew seeks the help of a therapist who tells him to revisit someplace that reminds him of childhood, so he goes back to his family home. He finds the Valco family now owns the house, and he offers them $250,000 to let him experience a true family Christmas, like the one he never had in that house with his family. Tom Valco (James Gandolfini) says yes, but it could be the worst decision he has ever made. Will Drew drive the entire family nuts? Surviving Christmas starts off as a wicked, dark, twisted look at Christmas that highlights the pressures we put ourselves under, and the misery we go through, but it quickly (like within 5 minutes) gives way to a What About Bob rip-off, which lacks the heart and humor of Bill Murray's classic. A team of four writers and director Mike Mitchell don't give the movie any flow. Scenes just happen, as if someone said, "we should have them go sleigh riding, then have something wacky happen," or "we should have them get together for a family dinner, then have something wacky happen." However, nothing wacky happens. Maybe annoying is a better term. Then, after failing to build anything and only giving lip service to character development, they try to push a weeper and a love story on us, because NO ONE EVER tried that before. Yeah, right. Affleck, bless his heart, is trying very hard to make us laugh, and succeeds from time to time, but the material isn't there to help him. He appears to be forcing the jokes, straining to be wacky, and begging us to like him. Affleck delivers in the more dramatic moments, but it's too little too late. He doesn't have any chemistry with co-star Gandolfini, who seems to be itching to be Tony Soprano, and romance fails to realistically develop in all but one scene with Christina Applegate - the Valcos' adult daughter, who thinks the whole rent-a-family scheme is atrocious (but you know she's going to fall for the big lug because she doth protest too much). If no one on the screen likes this knucklehead, how are we supposed to embrace him? That's a question our writers and director fail to answer. With any luck, Surviving Christmas will be gone from theaters before Thanksgiving, so don't plan to take your family during the holiday season (unless that season is autumn). Don't worry. At this pace, it will be out on DVD just in time for Easter. 1 Waffles (Out Of 4) Copyright 2004 - WaffleMovies.com
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