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Back Shelf Beauties
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The Chronicles of Narnia: This movie rocked me to my core, and changed my world as I know it. I have always maintained that TALKING ANIMALS ARE FUNNY. However, The Chronicles of Narnia proves, sometimes, talking animals are not funny. Sometimes, they are waging a holy war of good versus evil, and Santa Claus is giving kids weapons of mass destruction for Christmas. The end is near. Repent while you can. Lucy (Georgie Henley), Edmund (Skandar "My parents must have been actors to give me such a crazy name" Keynes), Peter (William "I have a normal name" Moseley) and Susan (Anna "Guess what rhymes with Popplewell" Popplewell) are siblings living in England during World War II. Germany's air force has been bombarding the country, making it unsafe for children in the towns targeted for destruction. Their mother, Mrs. Pevensie (Judy McIntosh) sent them to the country via an evacuation program, so they live in a huge, mysterious mansion with Professor Kirke (Jim Broadbent) and his housekeeper, Mrs. MacCready (Elizabeth Hawthorne). One day, Georgie finds an empty room with a large wardrobe. She steps in, and it takes her to a magical, but dangerous land where animals, led by their lion king Aslan (voice by Liam Neeson) are at war with the evil White Witch (Tilda Swinton). Soon, her siblings join her in this magical land, and seem to be fulfilling a grand prophecy that could lead to glory or tragedy (and you might be wondering who slipped something groovy in your brownies). Will Aslan and the Pevensies defeat the White Witch and restore order to the land of Narnia? Will the ever find their way back to England? Will they want to? The Chronicles of Narnia, based on a very popular children's book by C.S. Lewis, would love to replicate the success of Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings, but it lacks the magic and gravitas of those movies. Sadly, I think the movie has several creepy and silly moments that take away from its better points. First, some of the characters' behavior is just icky. Lucy's first friend in Narnia is a teen to twentysomething-year old centaur named Tumnus (James McAvoy), who leers at the 10-year old like I check out pretty co-eds on the subway. The entire premise requires a great deal of openness to fantasy and suspension of disbelief, but some of the lines coming from the talking animals push the boundaries. Also, I wasn't kidding when I said Santa Claus gives the Pevensie children weapons of war for Christmas. Peter gets a killer sword for hand-to-hand combat, and Susan scores a bow and arrow set to kill anything she wants from 100 yards away. Santa, all I want for Christmas is a grenade launcher or flamethrower (no, I WON'T shoot my eye out). Second, director Andrew Adamson and the writing team attempt to insert several moments of levity with jokes and pratfalls sure to entertain the kiddies, but this deflates any sense of drama and excitement they attempted to establish in scenes leading up to it. We're talking about a major world war happening in the middle of this mythical forest, so we don't need the laughs, when more information is needed to help make the story more interesting. I would like to have gone beyond the basic facts to learn more about the great battle between The White Witch and Aslan, more about the life the children led with their family before the war and how The White Witch became powerful enough to impose a constant winter. Third, Adamson goes to the other end of the extreme spectrum and overdoes the drama and magic at times. The scene where Lucy finds the wardrobe is almost melodramatic as she whips the sheet off the wardrobe in super slow motion to the rising orchestral music. Key moments in an otherwise brilliant climactic battle scene go into similar slow motion with the sound cut out to somehow make us feel as if we are in the moment. Like the wardrobe scene, it's all a little too obvious. Finally, Swinton doesn't quite hit her stride as The White Witch. She is wonderful with the character's simmering evil and imposing stature, but fails when it comes to The White Witch's big, rabble rousing war speech. Neeson ads a nice, peaceful regality to Aslan, which makes him a hero even before his biggest, most valiant act, and the kids are very good as we watch them become more adult as the events they are involved with become more important. Henley might be one of the cutest kids in the business today, and wins over the audience with her joyful and curious forays into Narnia. My biggest warning to parents is the movie's rating. While it earned a PG, it's more like a PG-13 movie directed by Mel Gibson. You get violence, Cain and Abel-style betrayal, a crucifixion, a massive battle seen, sword fights, people getting stabbed and even more. Is this Passion of the Christ Part Deux? I can't imagine most kids under 13 could handle this, especially the crucifixion-like scene that had a small 4-year old girl in my theater frighteningly asking her mom what was going on. Not a good conversation to have with 300 other people around. The Chronicles of Narnia is full of some amazing animation as we see CGI animals walking as smoothly and realistically as the real thing, and their speech patterns are amazingly lifelike. Adamson also makes the climactic battle scene into one of the best I have seen this year, but it doesn't quite make up for the bad parts. 1 ½ Waffles (Out Of 4) Copyright 2005 - WaffleMovies.com
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