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Back Shelf Beauties
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Yu-Gi-Oh! I didn't live through the 60's and flower power, but Yu-Gi-Oh has shown me what it's like to be on an acid trip. Seeing the movie also made me realize a level of fear I have never felt before as I was surrounded by 100 or more 7-year olds worked into a frenzy by the action. It was like a riot in the Land of Oz with Munchkins Gone Wild! I thought Loews would have to call in the tear gas as kids came out of the theater leaping down the stairs and attacking the cardboard cutouts in the lobby (I can understand, and support, attacking Catwoman, but did they have to rip the head off Will Smith and the I, Robot?). I'd try to summarize the plot for you, but it was fairly incomprehensible. I hope kids familiar with the TV show and trading cards will know what is happening. As far as I can tell, Yugi unlocked some sort of centuries old evil by reconstructing the Millennium Puzzle and unleashed a bunch of dragons, monsters, knights, an ancient pharaoh (who looks like Yugi) and an evil dude, Anubis, who has been looking for his chance to control the world. Yugi goes on to become the grand champion of a popular card game, but develops a rivalry with Kaiba, who will stop at nothing to become the new champ. Sensing an opportunity, Anubis finds a way to control Kaiba and force a showdown with Yugi that could lead to world domination. Will Anubis succeed at his evil plan? Can any adult in the theater survive? I took one for the team this week, so send your condolences to waffle@wafflemovies.com. Yu-Gi-Oh feels more like a 90-minute commercial for the Yu-Gi-Oh cards and video game than a movie with a plot, characters we care about and a story that will enthrall the audience. Even the game feels like you make up the rules as you go. Director Hatsuki Tsuji's story consists of several supposedly dramatic card game showdowns between Kaiba, Yugi, the game creator and Yugi's flunkies. Aside from some corny jokes and the worst dialogue I have ever heard (classic lines like, "eternity doesn't last forever."), the script consists of each player dramatically screaming how he will be playing such and such a card that unleashes some wild monster with amazing power, so he can win the game. Eventually, Tsuji runs out of cool, scary monsters, and has to unleash such amusing characters as The Obnoxious Celtic Warrior (wasn't that Danny Ainge's nickname in the 80's?) and some clown-like creature who looks like a Barnum and Bailey reject. If your kid is a Yu-Gi-Oh fan, then God help you, but you probably already know what's in store for you. Buy yourself some popcorn, milk duds and a large soda to make it worth your while. 0 Waffles (out of 4) Copyright 2004 - WaffleMovies.com
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