Burn After Reading

Was everyone involved with this movie sitting around gossiping behind Joel and Ethan Coen’s backs about how Burn After Reading was so bad? Did everyone just drink the Kool Aid or put the blinders on in an attempt to get through the experience? Did Tommy Lee Jones put a voodoo curse on the movie?

John Malkovich stars as Osborne Cox – a CIA desk chief unwillingly demoted to a position with the State Department, so he decides to seek revenge by writing a damning memoir of his time with the agency. Unfortunately, the CD-ROM storing his manuscript goes missing, only to be found by two trainers at a fitness center, Chad (Brad Pitt) and Linda (Frances McDormand), who plan on making a few dollars off its discovery (Some may call it a finder’s fee, the cops probably will call it blackmail). Also, making his life even more miserable, Cox’s wife, Katie (Tilda Swinton), is ready to dump him for Harry (George Clooney), who is not exactly being faithful to others in his life.

Will Osborne be able to get his book back?

Will he be able to get his wife or his job back?

Will this movie ever end?

We talked about this a few weeks ago with Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2 (and I am sure many of you cringed as I started to compare something as déclassé as Sisterhood 2 to a Coen Brothers piece of art), but, unfortunately, Burn After Reading has a similar problem. It’s a movie with lots happening, but nothing happening.

Writers/directors Joel and Ethan Coen try to create a complex web of deceit and comedy, but the movie and plot don’t take form as we witness a never ending cast of characters and the constant formation of multiple layers of interaction between them. Even with all of these layers and characters, you never feel like there is much meat here.

I want to say Burn After Reading has trouble getting going, but it NEVER gets going. You sit there wondering when the plot will kick in, when the thrills will kick in, when the jokes will kick in, but this movie could never be a showgirl or member of the Pittsburgh Steelers. It doesn’t kick.

The Coens provide some funny moments, most with Pitt acting as silly and ridiculous as possible, while Malkovich takes cursing to a new level and Clooney has some fun with a quirky character, but these moments stand out for being so rare and too far and few in between. The Coens do not provide enough jokes and the correct rhythm to be a riotous farce. The tone feels too dramatic due to the music and camera work that takes us out of the laughing mode. And, you find yourself agreeing with another character late in Burn After Reading when he says, “Report back to me when it makes sense.”

Burn After Reading is rated R for pervasive language, some sexual content and violence.