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by Willie Waffle

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Alex Rider:
Operation Stormbreaker

It’s more like Operation Snoozemaker.

Alex Pettyfer stars as Alex Rider – a typical TV-star looking high school kid in London.  After his parents died, Alex moved in with his uncle, Ian Rider (Ewan McGregor), who seems to be off on business very often, and the nanny, Jack Starbright (Alicia Silverstone).  Alex soon learns Uncle Ian was an agent for MI6 (the British CIA), and finds himself recruited to investigate Darrius Sayle (Mickey Rourke) – a businessman who appears to have some diabolical plot in motion. 

What is Sayle’s big plot?  Can Alex Rider stop him in time?

Alex Rider: Operation Stormbreaker is supposed to be a teenage version of a James Bond movie, but this kid is no Sean Connery, or Daniel Craig.  Heck, he’s not even Timothy Daulton.  The problem is how director Geoffrey Sax tries to straddle the divide between making a kid movie and making an action movie.  As an action movie, we have violence, fights and people getting shot at, which might be a bit much for the younger kids. 

However, even at its most violent, Sax doesn’t show any blood or the ramifications of the violence, as the camera turns away before the gun is shot and we see reactions rather than results, which makes it feel unrealistic.  This might be a turn off for the 13-years old and up set.  We are left with a movie that is much like a date with me.  As she might say, “he didn’t do anything wrong, but Willie wasn’t all that exciting and memorable either.”

Alex Rider: Operation Stormbreaker is a bland movie.  In addition to the violence and lack of violence questions raised above, the adult characters are cartoonish at best.  Bill Nighy and Missi Pyle are silly as the villains, when both can do so much better, and Pettyfer might look good on the cover of Teen People, but has nothing compelling about him.  The kid lacks the spark and dynamism you would expect from a leading actor (no matter what age he or she might be).  Finally, the big evil Stormbreaker plot doesn’t shock the audience or move us in anyway to care about what might happen.   

Alex Rider: Operation Stormbreaker needs to go to detention.

1 Waffles (Out Of 4)

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